Our homeschooling journey began on the 21st of September, 2020. This was a day carefully chosen; a day of meaning and significance to us – the day of the Autumnal Equinox.
We are currently coming to the end of our fourth week. Homeschooling has challenged me. It has gently nudged me into finding some grounded and realistic, yet creative and awe-inspiring ways to teach my child.
I always thought that I was open-minded, but even I have walls that can be blasted through. Luckily for me, I am gifted with the love of learning, I love to expand, and I am always willing to challenge my ego – as much as this unnerves my ego. Thus far, homeschooling has encouraged me to broaden my mind; to look at things in a different way; to seek other possibilities that I had never considered before. While I do follow some curriculums, there is often room for expansion, and that is when I am called to explore outside things of the box. My creativity gets called upon which is fuelled by my inquisitive mind. Homeschooling has been incredibly enriching. It builds upon the gratitude and wonder of Life that I have been cultivating upon the last few years. With homeschooling, not only do I have the privilege of spending more time with my children, but I also get to choose what they are exposed to and what they learn – and I get a second chance to learn what I missed out on in my 41 years of my Life, thus far.
Today, I challenged a way for my daughter to be able to build a relationship with something, rather than just objectifying and looking at something as if it were unrelated to her. After watching a children’s math’s show, with the cartoon zero saying he was a “big, fat nothing”, we began looking at the the number “0”.
I realized that I had spent the large majority of my Life dismissing the number “0”, and upon examination, it carries more significance than I first realized. Another way of saying “0” is “nothing”. “Nothing” can carry both a negative or positive connotation. “Nothing” can leave us with the impression that something is meaningless and unimportant. As someone fascinated by the mind, passionate about meditation and yoga, I realized that “0” can also be regarded as a number of neutrality; the number of the meditative mind. Nothing. A Void. Empty. It is a number of incredible infinite possibilities. It is a number that is naturally – and fortunately – free from any judgement whatsoever. It is “Nothing”. In addition, the shape of the “0” can also suggest Infinity; something unending.
The Void, Emptiness, Nothingness can suggest an area of uncertainty. It can suggest an area of poverty. And, it can also suggest an area of incredible richness.
As I drove with my children in the back, I pondered upon the number “0”, and I was reminded of the lyrics from one of my favorite songs:
“Above, it isn’t bright, And below it isn’t dark. In the realm of Nothing. We return to Nothing.”
In the past few weeks, my body has been experiencing some unease. When the discomfort was strong, what did I have left to turn to? I was encouraged to let go of my attachment to my body. I was encouraged to pay attention to the subtle, yet powerful. I was encouraged to let the thoughts and the mind go. I was encouraged to rest; to realize the amount of energy it takes to uphold the nonsense that we upkeep. As I drove with my children, I allowed the pleasant, as well as the unpleasant thoughts, feelings, emotions, sensations to come and express themselves freely – without rejection nor attachment, and above all no judgement of any of it. Just letting it be. And at times, as this process developed and things were allowed to express themselves freely, a sensation of love emerged underneath of all of that – That which had been previously hidden by the minds’ heavy stories. I was experiencing the gift of Neutrality.
After I had spent some time in this state, I called back to my 5-year-old in the back seat. She is still too young to understand. Yet, I am also aware of the power of planting future seeds, and so I told her:
” Zero is the number of Nothing – and Everything. It is a number of Peace.”